Dear Would Be Writer
You Think You're a Writer
That's What You Think But I'm Right Here To Tell You Otherwise. I'll Be Polite. I Will Thank You For Your Submission Thank You For GIving Us The Chance And The Opportunity Thank You For Submitting Allowing and Permitting Thank You Thank You Would Be Writer There's a Big But
Coming Next
A Very Big But
You Aren't You Won't and You
Will Not Ever Be If I Who Am in my Small Windowless Room With an Infinite Supply of Pencils and Pens Truly I Who Eat Cottage Cheese In a Plastic Container For Lunch I Who Have No Cell Phone Even an Old One I Who Receive No Dinner Invitations Ever if I Who Every Single Day Drink Plain Boiled Water I Don't Even Use a Tea Bag In My Cup Luke Water's ough For Me If I Who Have a Yellow Marker Next to My Bed To Note the Endless Grammatical Improprieties In Every Flyer That Crosses My Desk If I Who Say No No No 100 Times On a Good Day Sometimes Even More I Am The One Who Says No.